The Guardian 1990 William Friedkin

Maybe a druid snatched your baby!  Let me explain.  There's this druid lady going around and posing as a nanny so she can snatch up babies and feed them to this big tree in the woods.  No shit.  It's also very poorly written, directed, edited, and acted.  Why hadn't I seen this before?  It's amazing.

I'd been meaning to watch this for years, but I kept getting distracted by other things.  Thank god for Netflix Instant or I'd probably never have seen this masterpiece of awfulness.  It is entertaining, though.  You just have to remind yourself that it contains a completely batshit crazy ending.  Because it does.  Does it ever...

If you've seen Lair of the White Worm, then you'll recognize the role of the druid nanny.  It's played by Jenny Seagrove, since Amanda Donohoe must have been busy.  Dwier Brown ( Kevin Costner's dad in Field of Dreams) plays the baby daddy, all the while looking and acting exactly like Eric Bana and Carey Lowell (Mrs. Richard Gere) plays the mother.  She looks exactly like Michelle Meyrink in Real Genius (Jordan, the hyper "Are you peeing?"girl).  The whole movie looks like it was shot by the Miami Vice TV crew.  The special effects are of the latex and fake blood variety, which is nice.  I kind of miss those effects these days.

If you're a fan of bad movies, you should watch this.  If you're a fan of fake blood and latex effects, you should watch this.  If you're a fan of spectacularly crazy, over the top endings, you should watch this.  Just be patient.  It's all worth it.